7.04.2017

Blood Sabbath (1972)

Oh god, Pure Terror why do you punish me so?  Did I not purchase you from the cruel Amazon and give you a home?  Did I not put you on my media shelf?

Blood Sabbath, aka Aquelarre Sangriento, tells the story of a Vietnam vet named David wandering around and getting menaced by a van of no good dirty hippies.  But these hippies are a bit different!  Instead of love and peace, they prefer brooms to fly on and black cats!  Cuz they are witches!!!!

I'm not sure if this movie was cut or something, because I had a hell of a time following it.  At one point the guy is being assaulted by a group of naked ladies, the next he is frolicking with a lady from the lake, then hanging out at a bar with a priest and some hobo guy.  The priest character is hilarious as he's got this great mustache and is constantly getting angry and shouting at people for the lamest of reasons (like the evil witch queen attempting to seduce him with naked ladies, or the "hero" begging him to steal his soul [can priests do that???]).

David is the lamest of heroes.  He just wanders around, having some flashbacks, dreaming about his lady from the lake, menacingly kicking over buckets of water whilst shouting.  I don't recall him really doing much of anything other than trying to find a way to get rid of his soul so that he can be with his water nymph.

The movie is just an excuse to show naked ladies running around for like 80 minutes—hey guys, no complaint here AM I RIGHT—but other than that there is really nothing here.  Not worth a watch.


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